The house gets a mess. I become unglued.
Titus whines and won't stop. I become unglued.
A glass of milk gets spilled on the floor. I become unglued.
There are days that when every little thing doesn't go my way, I lose it!
Last week, I was doing "school work" with Trinity. She has been having trouble sounding out words that start with "th" correctly.
We were doing her school work when it was her nap time. She was sleepy and wasn't even trying. She could not sound out the words correctly and had stopped even trying. I became UNGLUED! We were both a crying mess. I had to pray and ask forgiveness and apologize to poor little Trinity.
And I hate that feeling.
But, I am so thankful that I serve a God who forgives. And not only does He forgive, He also helps us with our problem!
Yesterday in church, I was asked to sing. I felt like I needed to sing, "Who Am I" by Casting Crowns. I was singing it and I just started crying right in the middle of the song. (I am sure the people having to listen to me really thought I was crazy!) But I got to thinking... Who am I that the eyes that see my sin would look on me with LOVE?!? and watch me rise again. Who am I? That the voice that calms the sea, would call out through the rain, and calm the storm in me.
That part got me. There have been so many times it has felt like there was, not just a storm, but maybe a full blown hurricane going on inside me. And I felt like I was going to explode! But, I can call on Jesus and He calms me. And not just that, He helps me not to do it again. If He knows we really want to change, He will help us.
I am so thankful for salvation, but I am also so thankful that Jesus didn't save us and say, "There you go. You are saved now, try and live the best you know how. I'll just be sitting here watching you. Waiting for you to mess up so I can hit you over the head until you get it right!"
He doesn't do that. He is constantly here, leading me. Guiding me. Helping me when I am wrong.
There is a book out now called, Unglued. I want to download it so bad! I think it will really help me. Have any of you ever read it?
Well, I have opened my heart to you guys. I hope you don't think too bad of me. Becoming unglued is something Jesus and I are really working on. I am so glad prayer works!
Don't beat yourself up. We have all been there! I think the lord has really helped me with self control, but there are definitely moments! Just wait til you have a teenager! :) I haven't read the book yet, but I have heard good things!
ReplyDeleteDon't remind me about the teenage years!!! Lol!
DeleteThank you for sharing your heart. I was just sitting here thinking about how confession is good for the soul. It is! About the reading...Emma had the exact. same. struggle with "the". So, we backed off for about a week, and when we came back, it went much smoother. You're doing a great job, Mama!
ReplyDeleteThank you so much for the encouragement! We were on lesson 18 so we went back to lesson 15 and started from there again. It helped a lot! She is doing so good! I am so proud of her!
DeleteDon't be so hard on yourself, if everyone was honest we would all say that we have become UNGLUED too. I use to be so bad, I hated it so much that I begged God to help and Thank God I am doing better. I do mess up sometimes but I am so thankful my family and God is always there with open arms willing to forgive me.
ReplyDeleteI am so thankful for a forgiving God too! I am so undeserving, yet He still loves me!
DeleteI think I am always UNGLUED. MY kids drive me batty sometimes until I explode. Then I feel guilty and cry after the kids go to bed. I beg God to help me and vow to do better the next day. Then the next morning chaos starts before my eyes open and they are at it again. The Lord is helping me. Now instead of yelling I close my eyes, calm down, and talk real sweetly to them. I think that scares them more than me screaming at them. Lol it's just a season though.......
DeleteI hope it's just a season. I could not imagine trying to do this "mom" thing on my own! I don't know how women who don't have God in their lives make it!
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